A lot of girls I know date people, find someone they like, get into a relationship, and then break up and repeat the cycle. They seem to stay pretty sane throughout and enjoy the process.
Complicated girls like me are not like that. We find it hard to love and hard to be loved. We wish things could be different, and we envy the girls who are, but we know that this is our plight in life and we must accept it.
If you aren’t someone who knows what this is like, you probably think complicated girls are just immature and not ready for a real relationship. You probably think we are overly dramatic and that we always operate on an unhealthy level. Which is partly true, and a lot of complicated girls are single for long lengths of time.
But once we find someone who can keep up, we can manage to make it work. Complicated girls are the hardest to handle, but the payoff is that you will never meet someone more amazing. More interesting. More energetic. More creative. More fun. More sensitive. More strong.
But once you have made the decision that you want to be along for the ride with this person, there are some things that you must be aware of:
Accept that there will be a lot of disagreements.
This is the hardest reality to accept about dating someone who is complicated. If you are used to being in relationships that are easy and calm with no fighting and that is what you prefer, then run far away from a complicated girl. She has way too many thoughts and feelings on every subject to always swallow her tongue.
If she is a mature complicated girl, then she can definitely see your side of things and come from a place of understanding, but she will still disagree with you frequently. Sometimes they will be little fights, sometimes they will be full on blow outs where she will throw you out of her apartment. She just has so much passion and desire inside that it sometimes manifests itself in the wrong ways. You may think that the two of you aren’t compatible, but trust me, she is like this with everyone. You can accept that and prepare to back down sometimes, or you can give up on her.
The good news is, she will always say sorry because she knows how dramatic and silly she was. And the extra good news is that the makeup sex is amazing. It’s not always fun, but it will always keep you on your toes.
Accept that you will have to share how you think and feel on the regular.
We need to know your opinions on things. We love to share our opinion, but we value yours too. We need to be able to say how we feel about things and expect you to reciprocate. How does your relationship with your father make you feel? How do you feel about your childhood? How does this song make you feel? How do you feel about current social issues?
We see very deeply into things, so please never expect surface conversations about literally anything. Of course we can be light and easy in certain situations if need be, as we are extremely adaptable creatures. But we don’t prefer it. We want to know your hopes and dreams and fears and we need you to open up to your deepest core or else we can never be satisfied. Please be ready to strip yourself down and get intimate in every way.
Accept that you will always have to be the best version of yourself
If you like to coast along casually and live in a formulaic, routine kind of life, then complicated girls are not your jam. We need to feel adventure, excitement, and surprise. We are huge advocates of personal growth and will be changing and developing new interests all the time. If you don’t do the same, this relationship will never work. You have to always be open to trying new things and going to new places. Complicated girls also love to meet new people, so you have to really like being social and making new friends.
On top of all that, we expect you to always be improving yourself, because we are. We are advancing our careers to the top and taking on new hobbies. We usually take good care of ourselves too, so expect to exercise and eat healthy with us. Know that you will always learn something new when you’re with her, because she is a sponge for all kinds of knowledge.
You will never get away with disrespecting a complicated girl. So if you aren’t ready to give her your all, don’t even try. She sees great potential in you and won’t allow you to slack in the relationship department. If you aren’t treating her right, she will find someone that will.
Expect to shower us with love and affection
Once complicated girls feel comfortable and safe in a relationship, they unleash their abundant ability to love. And no one will love you harder. We need constant attention and affection, but we will be doing the same and more for you. We will worship your body and make love to you like it’s your last day on Earth.
We need be kissed often and told we are loved every day. We need you to be completely open and sensitive with us. We want constant displays of affection, not necessarily in public, but just for us. We need poems, heartfelt cards, love songs, and flowers. We want you raw and unguarded. Anything less will make us feel insecure and we will have no problem letting you know. But if you keep us happy and feeling loved, we will reward you twofold.
Expect to be completely open-minded
We don’t like small minds. We don’t tolerate hate or discrimination. We are empathetic creatures who value all people and accept everyone. Our expansive hearts and minds can see the good in everyone and everything.
If you are a rude or closed minded person who can’t see the humanity in others then you will never have a relationship with a complicated girl.
All of my current friends are complicated girls and they are some of the most amazing people I have ever met. No one will say that being in a relationship with them, or me, isn’t a challenge but it’s one that is worth fighting for. Don’t let her get away.